Camille's 10 commandments

I have already compared Internet to a messiah in this post. It occurs to me these days that Internet has become a true religion to some people, and I would be lying if I did not include myself in them. If we were to invent a new internet ideology, we would soon come across the problem of the doctrine and the rules.

So what I offer today are the Internet’s Ten Commandments!

1 You shall have no other gods before me.

2 You shall spend at least two hours a day worshipping me and learning about everything that is new in my vastness.

3 You shall buy an almighty antivirus software, so that you do not get lost with the wrong waves that circulate.

4 You shall learn how to worm your way into the millions of my other followers, by posting videos, music and pictures, so you can become fashionably famous.

5 You shall update your professional profile on LinkedIn of Viadeo in order to get a job without trouble.

6 You shall raise a virtual plant or pet that you cannot raise in real life because your flat is too small.

7 You shall master the internet language, with word such as “irl”, “lol”, “roflmao”, “afk”, “ty” or “stfu” (no need to put an hyperlink for that one!).

8 You shall learn how to make compatible your real life, real friends and real wife and your virtual identity, your online friends and lover.

9 You shall not download illegally, or if you do, you shall not get caught.

10 You shall live several lives in one, kill thousands of aliens, destroy barbarian hordes, become shaman of your guild, build legendary cities and finally… go to your small real bed when you turn your computer off.

I did not think following a doctrine could be so funny! I guess it is true, Internet’s God works in mysterious ways…

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